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It Happened To Me: I let my father pay me for sex My mother told me that everyone is done with me, and to please leave them alone.
I don’t remember when he started touching me, that was just always a part of our relationship. I remember when he started having sex with me. I was young. Then he stopped for a few years. Maybe he was afraid he would get caught. He started again when I was around 13. He never physically forced me, but would ask and beg. “Daddy loves you so much.” “Please do this for daddy.” “Daddy wants to make you feel good.” I was ashamed and I’m still humiliated by the fact that my body liked some of what he did to me. But I did not like it. Or want it. I…
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The “wage gap” explained in simple terms We even have pictures.
All sex workers should be armed It could be the only thing saving you from the psychos.
The problem with ‘soulmates’ The beauty of romance isn't in an elusive forever just as the beauty of humanity isn't in an elusive heaven.
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I interviewed my mom about me selling my body For a Mother's Day this year, I interviewed mom on what it's like to parent a prostitute.
Cate: Everyone will remember how I was outed to you by a client. What were your feelings when that happened? Did you already suspect something was up? Mom: Well, I remembered you said you were going to enter the sex industry when you turned 18 because you could get better rates if you were “barely legal.” I figured you had followed through with this plan because you were so adamant that this was what you wanted to do. When I had the truth coming right from a client, I was totally exasperated and could not for the life of me figure out why you would want to waste your life…
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We asked an AI for good sex positions and the results are horrifying We trained an AI to ponder life's great questions, such as how to get off even harder.
It Happened To Me: I succumbed to desire and asked my husband’s hot friend to teach me yoga The wedding band is no ward against desire. I knew I was playing with fire.
Men shouldn’t be afraid to wear makeup I’m a man who wears makeup, and no, I’m not ashamed of it.
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Sex work made me realize feminists are toxic I won't support a system that endangers me by criminalizing my clients and attempting to end demand for my services.
I have a confession to make, guys: I’m not a feminist. Most people seem to assume I am, after all I’m a very, very proud sex worker who firmly believes that a woman’s body is hers to do with what she likes. To quote the immortal words of Salt ‘N’ Pepa, “If she wanna be a freak and sell it on the weekend, it’s none of your business.” I also firmly believe that the construct of femininity is ridiculous and everybody should have the same rights, and all that good stuff. However, I cannot in good conscience call myself a feminist. This wasn’t always true. Back when I started working,…
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The unending frustrations of an ethical porn consumer A porn consumer's manifesto.
“Virginity” is an outdated—and yes, white supremacist—concept The malicious concept has become nebulous to throw us off its trail, but we see right through it.
I don’t love my body, and that’s OK Dear Fat Acceptance Movement, why is it WRONG to desire having a (slim) body that I myself find attractive?
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The surprising misandry that comes from being a sex worker Men are simple creatures who are blind to their privilege and easily become clingy and emotional. It's ok to be misandrist.
Like any subculture, the subculture of sex workers has its trends. Currently, the latest thing is misandry ranging from the playful to the deadly serious. It’s sort of a complex issue, because while I firmly believe one can’t simultaneously be a good sex worker and also a true misandrist, it’s also true that as sex workers we often see men at their rawest, which means we frequently see them at their worst. It’s not that my clients are violent or cruel–it’s just that, well, dudes can be the worst. They can also be thoughtful, charming, sweet, and generally lovely, but eventually they all tend to revert to their default of…
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13 things I wish I’d known before having sex I want to go back and mythbust sex to the ignorant, panic-stricken teen on that couch.
The joys & struggles of early onset Grandma Syndrome We'd rather bake cookies and watch reruns of Law & Order than hit the town. Get off our backs already.
9 types of annoying couples that will make you appreciate being single Being single is pretty great, after all.
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What I learned from being raided and sent to Chicago’s infamous ‘hooker school’ During my 5yo sex worker career, I have experienced work-related fear twice. This is the story of my raid and sentence.
During my almost five-year career as a sex worker, I have experienced work-related fear exactly twice. The first time was at the very beginning of my adventures in the sex industry, when a client outed me to my mother (I got my revenge — and wrote about it here). The second time was two weeks ago when I got arrested. After almost five years of whoring in various legal grey–and even black–areas, it finally happened. The day started like any other; I got to work (our “fetish house”) early, brushed out my pin curls, socialized with the other girls, and was generally having a blast. The day was neither slow nor…
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Seven annoying statements you hear from every white male waiter Eating out is a luxury sullied by the insipid banter diners are subjected to by their servers—and it needs to S.T.O.P.
The “make me beautiful” photoshop experiment Esther Honig sent a picture of herself to 40 photoshoppers across the globe with one request: “Make me beautiful.” Check out the results.
How to Feng Shui your bedroom to attract hot men Bring in the love of your life, welcome some sizzling romance, or add spark to your current relationship.
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Rape is no different for a sex worker I believe a lot of what helped me deal with my rape and the abuse I suffered was my background in sex work.
How My Abusive Relationship Began Extricating oneself from an abusive relationship is never easy. They don’t show you that part in the movies. They only show our heroine, generally a perky, smiling blonde, with clean hair and a new lease on life. They don’t show you the loneliness, the confusion, the terrible sense of disgust with oneself. That doesn’t make the final cut. It isn’t just different for me because I am a pensive brunette, rather than a perky blonde. My difficulties do not stem from the fact that I rarely have time or inclination to wash my hair more frequently than once a week. Don’t get me wrong, I…
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My john outed me to my mom. This is how I got revenge. Grossouts ahead.
12 super offensive Xmas songs to get you in the mood for the stress to come Abusive Christmas songs are just as traditional as the more saccharine stuff -- and a lot more palatable.
7 gifts girls never want to receive The seven gifts you should avoid buying for your girlfriend this Christmas—or any occasion.
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Are ‘sex surrogates’ therapists with benefits? Although her job involves getting paid to have sexual contact, Cheryl is not a sex worker: she is a surrogate partner.
Over the last forty years, Cheryl Cohen Greene has had intimate relations with more than 900 people. Although her job involves getting paid to have sexual contact with strangers, Cheryl is not a sex worker: she is a surrogate partner. An Intimate Life: Sex, Love, and My Journey as a Surrogate Partner recounts the exceptional life of one of America’s first clinical sexologists. After coming of age in a strictly Catholic family in the 1950s, Cheryl cast off her rigid upbringing in favor of sexual revolution. She married a man her parents disapproved of, altered the terms of that relationship through an open marriage, and eventually began a career in…
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If your children are fat, you are failing as a mother Being poor, lazy, or tired are invalid excuses for tossing a frozen pizza at your fat, unhappy kid.
18 supreme perks of having a pregnant belly This is why some women stay serial preggers.
Everything you need to know about toxic shock syndrome Not just tampons, and not just women.
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My john outed me to my mom. This is how I got revenge. Grossouts ahead.
Shortly before I became a full-fledged prostitute, my mother found out I was a sex worker. While not quite an abolitionist, my mother–who grew up during the 1960s and came of age in the 1970s–has always taken a dim view of the sex industry. During my teen years, even during my first month as a sex worker, I didn’t own a cell phone. I arranged all appointments either exclusively through email or by calling prospective clients from my mother’s house phone after blocking the number. Not owning a cell phone was so natural that it honestly didn’t occur to me to buy a prepaid phone. Besides that, I had gotten…
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Stop doing these 10 things your vagina HATE Your vagina is sending out an S-O-S.
9 times when moms need extreme patience Sometimes, kids try your patience—and sometimes, they really, *really* try it. These are those times.
Which bookstore trope are you? These are the ten types of people you'll see at the bookstore.
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I became a prostitute because my friends were doing it—and I regret nothing I decided I wanted to be a prostitute when I was seventeen. None of the assumptions about why are correct.
I decided I wanted to be a prostitute when I was seventeen. Most people assume I made this decision because I had seen Pretty Woman too many times, because my parents didn’t hug me enough, or because I was somehow coerced into my decision. None of these assumptions are correct. I’ve always been prone to viewing my life more as a story or a series of discrete experiences than as an actual life of connected events. However, saying I decided to join the oldest profession to advance my story is also overly simplistic. During my teen years, almost all of my friends were older than me and many of my…
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Men shouldn’t be afraid to wear makeup I’m a man who wears makeup, and no, I’m not ashamed of it.
Women who don’t want daughters are missing out If you think girls are tough to raise then you're just perpetuating a stereotype.
The strange things men pay prostitutes to do When I worked as a street prostitute, men paid me to do things you'd never imagine.
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Dread: When my simps ask if I find them attractive I quickly learned honesty is no good.
Often clients ask what type of man turns me on. After one (phone sex) call where I gave my honest answer I’ve learned it’s best to tailor my response. I was still a newbie phone sex operator when a guy asked what kind of man attracted me. Without thinking I told him: broad shoulders, deep voice, long hair, facial hair, in shape but not overly muscular, the type of man that can split wood and fix a car, kinky, intelligent, well read, politically active and independent, the type of person who purposely lives outside of mainstream culture, funny, tattoo’d, eccentric, artistic. After I was finished my client said “oh” and…
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Sluts lower the value of all women—here’s how to compete with them It's easy!
Black teeth and dilated pupils: 15 extreme beauty trends of the past Hold off on fluffing those brushes — these are beauty trends you may not want to blend with.
Femcels rising: how to cope with lack of sex and intimacy The media is bombarding us with sex tips and sex normalization. But what if we're not getting any? How do the rest of us fit in?
