OK, I know. The title makes me sound like a horrible person — and you’re absolutely right if you’re thinking that was an awful thing to do. It was! I guess my objective here is to paint myself as a …
Highlights from my bizarre FBI file, and how to FOIA your own I got a padded mailer from the FBI yesterday.
At some point last year, I sent off Freedom of Information Act (FOIA) requests to a number of government agencies. I’d actually pretty much forgotten about it after getting form letters back from a number of agencies saying they had …
Aaww! Fainting kittens is the most adorable genetic deformity ever This is like natural selection or something.
You may be familiar with that fainting goats video that went viral many many moons ago. It’s a condition called “congenital myotonia,” an aversion to loud sounds that makes the animal afflicted with it “faint.” And apparently kittens can get …
It Happened To Me: I made my sister believe she got molested by our uncle I may have gone too far this time.
When does a practical joke go too far? After four years married to my husband, I’ll admit my gauge is a bit off. In our house the rule is: nothing is off limits, as long as it’s funny. That being …
My Big Fat Mexican Drug Deal: a honeymoon story I just knew that my new husband and I would end up spending our honeymoon in a rat infested prison cell a la Midnight Express.
I had every intention of smuggling a fat sack of medical quality marijuana on my honeymoon to Cabo San Lucas, but I chickened out at the last second. I was all ready to go with a weed filled maxi pad …
It Happened To Me: I smuggled weed in my cooch and then TSA stopped me This was where it would all end for me.
I walked up to the airport security checkpoint feeling confident and secure — with a fat sack of weed in my underpants. I’d brought more pot than I needed on my trip back East to see my family and there …
The seven terrifying stages of sleep paralysis Sleep paralysis is absolutely terrifying and chances are you'll experience it at least once. Here's what to expect.
Have you ever had one of those nightmares that you wake up and you can’t move and you feel like something is there in the room watching you? This has happened to me and I’m always interested in meeting other …
It Happened To Me: I’m obsessed with my husband’s obsessed ex I imagined myself through Sam’s eyes—she could only glean what I was like through press photos. 2D me is so much cooler than the real me.
The year 2007 started off with me deciding to go on Zoloft. I ended a four-year relationship with a guy who might as well have been my brother, I fired my agents (I’m an actor), and I stopped leaving my …
What does a year’s worth of makeup look like on a face? Melting Voldemort.
How does a year’s worth of makeup look on a face? Filmmakers Lernert & Sander documented it, and believe you me, it’s not pretty. Dubbed ‘Natural Beauty’, the pair and their team piled on 365 applications of make up on …
Why I am against sexy breast feeding and using a baby as a marketing gimmick to sell porn The 'sexy mommy' mob is after me for calling Madison Young's use of her baby as a non-consenting prop creepy.
I am utterly baffled that I have to explain these things, but the sexy mommy mob is still hysterical after my comments on Twitter last week that feminist darling Madison Young is creepy-as-fuck for how she uses her baby as …