Encourage men to pee sitting down to be more inclusive of Trans men Not every man is able to pee standing up. It is time for men to take a seat on the throne to create a more inclusive environment in the men's room.

“As I was transitioning, I found it triggering to constantly have to use the stall when going to the bathroom with my cisgender male friends,” my best friend since college recently confessed to me via Discord. I had already educated me thoroughly on the many issues faced by the Transgender Community, but I admit I had never even thought about anything like this before.

The wheels in my head started whirring, and soon enough I came up with this beauty. You see, benefits of sitting down to pee for a cisgender man can include a feeling of independence, a reduction in total bathroom breaks, an even easier cleanup, SAFETY, and much, much more. Let’s explore 30 reasons men should sit down to pee!

Solidarity with Transmen and Women.

Yay!

Not taking an aggressive penis stance shows that you are secure in your masculinity.

You aint no queer, are ya, son?

You tend to put more pressure on your bladder when sitting down to pee and this can be beneficial in urinating more.

Who doesn’t want a complete pee?

Improved body image and a sense of calm.

Sitting while peeing gives you a strong sense of feeling safe, putting a more positive spin on the experience of peeing, the ability to concentrate more on what you’re doing because of the relief that comes from having your legs spread wide instead of trying to hold them up with one hand while trying not to take a leak in the other.

Comfort.

Golden throne.

Choose a seat with a built-in cushion. Or 24 carat gold. Or treat yourself to one of those fancy Japanese ones that sing to you and massage your back.

During standing, a person needs to lift the penis higher during urination.

Duh!

Sitting down is considered modern in progressive cultures like Sweden and the UK.

Ditto.

Peeing standing is a sign of immaturity.

That Calvin and Hobbes cartoon is part of the zeitgest, printed on everybody’s brain. Peeing while standing will forever be associated with little boys.

You should only stand when you can’t find a toilet that’s suitable for you to sit on.

To assume one can always pee standing up or sitting down is naïve at best.

Women pee squatting, and both sexes pee in a direction different than from an open leg in a straight line.

Duh.

Sitting makes your urethra wider so the urine you release is easier to empty.

Once again with the incomplete pees. You don’t want that.

Sitting allows you to pet your dog while peeing.

Poochie needs a belly rub, yes he does!

If you are standing, the position in which your feet are placed may pose a risk, and you can fall over.

Safety first.

Cleanliness.

And finally, here’s one reason sitting down to pee is downright earth-shattering and a MUST MUST MUST: Your pee is more likely to go down into the water. A man needs to control what goes into the toilet. Learn from the best — Women and Transmen already figured out the secret!

P.S. Protect yourself from the coming data-powered panopticon by getting a VPN.

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Dopaaaaaaa
Guest
Dopaaaaaaa

Wow, I can’t believe someone took the time to write this and then label is “social justice”

What a moronic era we live in ..

Voorhees Chigurgh
Guest
Voorhees Chigurgh

I will not merely continue peeing in an erect, standing position, but I will also ensure there is always a nasty white hooker under me to receive my golden stream. Chuck Berry style.

Justin Thyme
Guest
Justin Thyme

I will not pee sitting down to cater to people with gender dysphoria. We should get the mentally ill some assistance rather than facilitate mental ilness

Real Dude
Guest
Real Dude

this article proves that gender dysphoria is indeed a mental disorder

roy batty
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roy batty

there’s no way this is real.

James
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James

absolutely the dumbest damn article I’ve ever read….

Amy
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Amy

This is hilarious

Michael Byrne
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Michael Byrne

Just because you wrote this article, Not only am I going to continue peeing as I always have but I’m also going to start shiting while standing up…

Notcrazy
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Notcrazy

This writer is doing is piss-poor job of transitioning if they want every earthly male to change how they pee just so they can feel better.

Simon Sterne
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Simon Sterne

I’m going to piss all over public toilet seats deliberately now just in case there’s one of these weirdos around who wants to sit!

Bob
Guest

What if someone just had to shit tho

Andy
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Andy

I will sit to shit and then wipe my ass with this dumb ass article

Brian Griffin
Guest
Brian Griffin

This is a parody, right? Right? Is that you, The Onion?

Piss Standing
Guest
Piss Standing

Potentially the dumbest thing I have ever read in my life. Whomever wrote this garbage has serious mental issues and should seek help ASAP. I will continue to stand up and piss on articles like this

mark
Guest

um not, i don’t care about these freaks that pretend to be me

Mel
Guest
Mel

What we need to do is find the people who write these stupid articles and take em out behind the woodshed for about 30 minutes and ‘cure’ them.

Robert
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Robert

Feminism is cancer. It destroys the fabric of society, tiny detail by tiny detail.

Samsonite
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Samsonite

Okay, but in return I’m going to shit standing up.

Evilsizer
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Evilsizer

I’m a cis male. I’m liberal af. I’m an ally.

Shut the fuck up.

Armando Simon
Guest
Armando Simon

I always wanted to be a mangina. Now I know how.

Justin
Guest
Justin

Reeeeeeeeeetarded

Danny Galarza
Guest
Danny Galarza

LOL

Beth Harbour
Guest
Beth Harbour

If you don’t have a penis you are not a man therefore do not belong in a men’s room

Big
Guest
Big

Just because someone cuts their dick off doesn’t mean they aren’t still a man. They’re just a dickless man.

Heather
Guest
Heather

Just let men piss however they want without guilt-tripping them, OK? Nobody judges men who go into the stalls (they may need to poo, you know!) so why would men choosing to use urinals really upset you so? Is it something to do with penis envy?

While I’m on the subject, if you’re a trans man who for some reason still has kept his uterus, don’t get upset when you hear or see the word ‘mother’ or ‘woman’ with regards to maternity and women’s healthcare- if you have the equipment designed to menstruate, you’re a woman, and if you’ve also given birth, you’re also a mother. It’s insulting to be reduced to a ‘person who menstruates’ and ‘birthing parent’.

And can you let us women have our own toilets without non-transitioned men who claim they’re women being allowed to also barge in? If you feel so strongly about not using the men’s, why not go the whole hog and demand your own trans bathroom? We all have the right to feel secure and comfortable in the most intimate of spaces!

lmao
Guest
lmao

>his uterus
Abort yourself, genuine down’s syndrome tier retard

Jon
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Jon

If you cant pee standing up you are not a man. Im so tired of all this liberal bs

Dan
Guest
Dan

I swear on God if the urinals are removed I’m going in the sink. Idgaf.

Male Pisschamp
Guest
Male Pisschamp

I’m just going to piss on the chicks with dicks

Jay
Guest
Jay

Can we stop the planet? I want to get off now. If people are offended to this level, you need to lock yourself in a sanitarium or your bedroom like Brian Wilson😅! If this level of insanity is to be considered by some to be normal what about the poor ladies? You know the “cisgender” ladies? The boring old penis lovin ladies? Am I not committing “gender appropriation??? Articles like this made me hate myself for liking basketball and eating tacos, NOW the way I urinate is inconsiderate? And I’m the one with a problem? Whoever wrote this shouldn’t have children.

Anon
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Anon

I’m a girl and trust me it’s not always easy to find a clean toilet. We women were taught by our mothers and grandmothers and great-grandmothers not to ever sit on a public toilet. If only we had the right equipment to stand to pee, life would be so much easier. No long lines in the men’s room. I’m sorry, if a person is uncomfortable peeing in front of others they can always use a stall.

Francis Ngannou
Guest
Francis Ngannou

No absolutely not. My penis touches the water. I have enough problems pooping and penis touching the water. It’s unsanitary and gross.

Rick
Guest
Rick

They should learn to piss like men

Jay
Guest
Jay

🤣🤣🤣

Bryan G
Guest
Bryan G

It is not other men’s responsibility to help another person feel included. If they don’t have the equipment to stand and pee not my problem. Trying to make men feel shame or anything is beyond your power.

The attempt to have me or any other reader feel shame for what we were born with is short sighted and manipulative. Since you want to be all accepting accept that young women who want to be men are still going to be women. They can pretend all they want and the change is not going to fix the feeling that they are not who they are “supposed” to be. That feeling can only come from with in that person.

Jay
Guest
Jay

Stop this planet I want to get off…

Hans Dangler
Guest
Hans Dangler

Highly unsanitary and not healthy at all. This is not valid or healthy medical advise. The splash. There is very definitely splash on the goods that dangle and it’s been cited as a health hazard before. The writer is just an irrational nag.

Sandflea
Guest
Sandflea

You can take my urinal from my cold, dead hands.

Jay
Guest
Jay

😅 🙌

MPC
Guest
MPC

so women in the rest room now want the men to sit down.. AHHH NO.

Dan
Guest
Dan

Let’s piss our pants to be more inclusive of people with bladder problems. Fuck off

Bobbert
Guest
Bobbert

Obviously you know nothing about male anatomy.
Have you ever tried to pee sitting down with an erection? Impossible to do with a massive mess, and you’re risking it touch the rim of the toilet.

Rico
Guest
Rico

Absolutely RIDICULOUS in every sense of the word

None
Guest
None

Really? You don’t even attach your name, to this trash article. Coward. You have too much time on your hands if your “wheels were turning” about this. Tired of playing make believe with you disillusioned idiots. Mind your own business, mutilate your body as you see fit, and quit demanding people conform to your body dysmorphia, especially when it comes to our private practices that are not your business.

Rico
Guest
Rico

Well Said

Ed
Guest
Ed

I’ve yet to figure out whether this is satire or not.

Jeff
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Jeff

This gave me a smile. Ridiculous to piss sitting down. I would be offensive to my aggressive penis if I didn’t let it shout “here I am” whenever I relieve myself. Trans men would likely feel more like one of the guys if peeing standing were a habit. And don’t forget to keep a urinal spacing, aggressive penises need room to roar!

Him Roid
Guest
Him Roid

Ha haha hahaha! That was the funniest comedy bit I’ve read in a whi…What?!…Nah!!!…You were serious? Really? You have a serious mental illness issue. Best go get those “wheels” in your head rebalanced! Sheesh…

Buckaroo Banzai
Guest
Buckaroo Banzai

Why not have women stand up to make EVERYONE feel more inclusive?

Sylas
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Sylas

What a joke!!!! Real men do what ever they want!!! We’ve been pissing standing up for thousands of years, not gonna stop now cause of all you idiots with nothing better to do then write ridiculous articles like this!!! Get a life!! I’ve got friends, as well as myself struggling with real LIFE problems, and for me to read this BS about sitting down to pee is just down right insulting!! Who gives a sh*t what anyone does in the bathroom, it’s the bathroom for god sakes!!! “Triggered, immaturity, improve body image” lol what real man gives two sh*ts about that.

Ps: I was just standing taking a pee while reading this article and patting my dogs head!!! Can you say talent!!

Joe Tongoy
Guest
Joe Tongoy

You might not really be a man if you can’t write your name while peeing. Just saying. They want to be included, stand at the trough with the rest of us.

William
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William

You people are idiots. Stop forcing your mental issues on everyone else. Live the way you want and leave others to do the same.

Doris Day
Guest
Doris Day

Sounds like hate speech to me. Why can’t trans men just use the women’s bathroom since their intention is to become women in the first place. Or use the family bathroom . Men should do what’s comfortable and I think standing is better for them like sitting is anatomically easier for women.

This article is trash.

K W
Guest
K W

When they say trans men, they mean a person born as a female who has transitioned to male. Completely agree though, complete rubbish.

Didge
Guest
Didge

Another point to follow my previous one – if you go into a cubicle, who knows whether you’re standing up or sitting down?

Is the author suggesting that men should all pee, sitting down, BUT WITHOUT CUBICLE DOORS SEPARATING US?

So that trans men can feel the same awkward camaraderie of being mere inches from someone else as you pee, staring at the wall and trying not to look at the penis of the person next to you?

I can’t see how this is going to make people more comfortable.

The alternative interpretation is to have everyone go into cubicles.But once you’re in your own private space, what do you care if someone outside is using a stand up urinal? You have peace and privacy

Didge
Guest
Didge

Peeing standing up is extremely useful. My girlfriend and I enjoy long country walks, and inevitably both of our bladders get full.

I nip quickly behind a tree, pee standing up, job done.

She has to find somewhere a lot more secluded, has to awkwardly balance and risks soaking her pants.

She’s very envious of men’s ability to pee standing up. It’s useful.

Now, men do sit down on the toilet to take a dump. And in such situations, the penis risks scraping on the porcelain.

Not exactly more hygienic, is it? Women are better adapted to peeing sitting down, men standing up.

Megan
Guest
Megan

How do I report this

Jeff Spurlock
Guest
Jeff Spurlock

Peeing while standing is a sign of immaturity!?!
According to whose standard? Certainly not according to common sense or logic.
What business is it of someone else’s how I pee. Standing or otherwise.
Being “triggered” over this shows a serious sign of immaturity and developmental problems.

Ivonne
Guest
Ivonne

This is a joke right? Real men should be able to Orr however they see fit . You are free to be trans all you want but don’t expect the world to accommodate you, period. I used to be an ally but it’s shit articles and expectations like this that are turning me off. At the end of the day this is a psychological problem or past life filtering through and should be treated accordingly without mutilating your body but there is more money in that than in actually helping people that have body dysmorphia.

Kam
Guest
Kam

Who wrote this?

Frustrated lady
Guest
Frustrated lady

Are you kidding me with this!!??
Sit or stand, just keep the pee off the seat!!
Does it really matter
What happens when the door is closed and your all alone…..NO!
Theres many more pressing issues in this world than this!
Seems some have way too much time on their hands.
How about the hungry?! How about the homeless!?
Get a job.

Tim Flannagen
Guest
Tim Flannagen

This is the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever seen.

Paul
Guest
Paul

I think women should stand to pee to be more inclusive of trans women. It would also be funny to watch (if one were so inclined).

Men who sit are more prone to bladder infections through less efficient emptying. Pretty much everything stated in this article is either wrong, or simply gibberish. The work of a concerned-womyn clearly.

Mongo
Guest
Mongo

Piss in the sink like a real man.

Jason Weeks
Guest
Jason Weeks

Finally!! Someone who gets it!!

PissesStandingUp
Guest
PissesStandingUp

I think I will now start pissing on the handle as well.

Captain Obvious
Guest
Captain Obvious

Real men piss standing up while cleaning their rifle.

geek49203
Guest
geek49203

Trump pees standing up… you don’t want to be like Trump do you? Just sit down will ya? (That should’ve been in the list ’cause reasons, right?)

Fred Z
Guest
Fred Z

Excellent parody.

Havermeyer
Guest
Havermeyer

Bake the Cake.
S*ck the C*ck.

Makes sense.

Thon Brocket
Guest
Thon Brocket

“Sitting down is considered modern in progressive cultures like … the UK.”

UKian here. You couldn’t be more wrong if you’d studied for it.

Heather
Guest
Heather

Fellow UKian; you’re right. I’m actually insulted and feel as if our nation’s been besmirched by this baseless accusation!

trackback

[…] Real men stand, honey. […]

BLF
Guest
BLF

Ever see a woman or trans piss their name in the snow?

Les VanHarlingen Metcalf
Guest
Les VanHarlingen Metcalf

next you people will demand me to suck cock because it will trigger you if I don,t…please the whole world is not west Hollywierd.

Jason Georgetti
Guest
Jason Georgetti

🤣🤣🤣

Heather
Guest
Heather

Have you never heard of some (not all) trans people claiming that it’s transphobic and ‘unimaginative’ of people if they refuse to have sex with them or date them because they don’t either fancy trans people or the gender they’re claiming to be? Seriously. Lesbians and straight men are meant to pretend penises are vaginas. Gays and straight women are supposed to pretend vaginas are penises. And we’re all supposed to like the fake varieties of either. People like this are the real enemies of the trans community, not those of us who question the dogma of blind acceptance of it all.

Gemma
Guest
Gemma

You people get more and more ridiculous every day. Telling men to sit and pee because YOU feel “triggered,” is just downright lunacy. What fragile beings you must be to expect people to bow to your ever psychotic demand.
Surely, this is a parody site.

Lemon
Guest
Lemon

First they take our guns