30% of couples already do it: join the separate beds revolution Couples who share a bed don't fully enter the necessary deep stages of sleep—and suffer the consequences.

Maybe it was his snoring. Or her blanket-hogging. Or that tossing and turning he does whenever he has a nightmare about evil clowns. Whatever it was, you’ve woken up feeling like you haven’t slept a wink all night.

If that scenario sounds familiar, you’re probably also familiar with how the rest of your day goes after a sleepless night: you’re grumpy, lethargic, and—yep, it’s not just your imagination—prone to picking more fights with your significant other.

A new study recently found that even one night of bad sleep quality can increase relationship conflict the next day—the worse couples slept, the less empathy they showed towards their partner, the more negativity they felt about the relationship, the harder they found it to resolve differences, and the more selfish feelings they had.

So what are the snorers and tossers and turners of the world to do?

Sleep in separate beds, according to some recent research. Banishing one person to sleep on the couch may seem like the end-result of sleep-deprived bickering, but a study from Ryerson University in Toronto claims it may actually solve your issues.

According to this study, 30 to 40 percent of couples already sleep apart (who knew?)… and they’re better off for it. Brain monitoring during sleep found that couples who share a bed don’t slip into the deep stages of sleep, whereas those who sleep apart do. Deep sleep is what helps restore your energy, boost your immune system, repair muscles and tissues, and stimulate growth and development. So constantly getting woken up by your partner during this stage can lead to feeling mentally and physically sluggish the next day.

Of course, there’s still a stigma to pulling a Lucy and Ricky Ricardo come nighttime, and some think that separate beds is a sign of a troubled relationship. But Colleen Carney, the director of Ryerson University’s Sleep and Depression Laboratory urges couples to ignore the taboo and try it if they feel they could benefit. “People can have very good and satisfying relationships sleeping apart,” Carney says. “Some people might be headed to divorce and then they actually sleep apart and find this new way to connect.”

Also, the celebs already do it.

Would you sleep in separate beds from your partner for the sake of deep sleep?

P.S. Protect yourself from the coming data-powered panopticon by getting a VPN.

Diana Vilibert is a freelance lifestyle, dating, and sex writer living in Brooklyn.

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Lindsey O.
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Lindsey O.

Depends on the people involved. I hate sleeping with anyone else in the room, let alone in the same bed. Had I been forced to sleep every night with my husband I would have murdered him within six months out of sheer frustration.

Separate bedrooms not only allow for different sleep habits they also allow for privacy – which many of us crave.

Mike W.
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Mike W.

whatever gets you through the night is all right…….I bet that a psychologist could wade into this subject and give us some thoughts to ponder……..me, I am an insomniac and like to listen to coast to coast……and my 2 cats sleep with me especially in winter……the more the merrier…..

june t.
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june t.

I’m a restless sleeper with a bad back and neck, who thrashes around a lot at night, with night sweats. I don’t sleep well with someone else, much better for us to sleep in 2 different beds. Best would be 2 beds in the same room, if bedroom is big enough. I’ve known a lot of couples who sleep in separate beds who seem quite happy and contented.

Sarah M.
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Sarah M.

It’s not a solution for everyone, but I think it’s a perfectly valid life choice. In fact, just over a hundred years ago it wasn’t considered a sign of a bad relationship, but the laudable sign of a healthy bank account to have completely separate bedrooms for spouses.

For my part, though, I’d rather sleep together with my loudly snoring husband, and he’d rather sleep with me even though I talk in my sleep and hog the covers. And we both prefer it when our cat – who expands exponentially in the night and turns to solid star matter that cannot be shifted for love nor mousies – to be in the bed with us.

It’s my considered opinion that each couple should work out their own sleeping arrangements based on their comfort, their resources (after all, it’s hard to have separate beds in a studio apartment), and their priorities as a couple. My choice wouldn’t work for everyone… as evidenced by the fact that a lot more people than I would have expected have already made the choice to sleep separately.

The only time I would consider it a sign of trouble is if not everyone involved directly with the relationship agrees.